MONEY FOR LOVE?

The subject popped up in conversation the other day I hanged out with my clique and one of our housemates had just survived another break-up. She spent most of her salary and savings on him and became financially troubled afterwards. She topped up his hand phone talk time credit regularly, bought him a brand new laptop, spent a few bucks for his hobby, let him used her car even without driving license, paid every lunch or dinner they had and many other things that left her broke before the pay day.

“If you feel that it’s worth to spend your money for, why not then?” a friend implied, with others seemed to casually agree with her. I might have concured to that, until she added, “I wouldn’t mind spending every single penny left in my savings for him. People might think that I am crazy, but money isn’t everything. At least he made me happy.”

I couldn’t agree more.

Well, I thought that she’s right for the reason that he temporarily made her happy but what happened if the relationship failed? He might have gone somewhere into the comfort of someone else’s arm, with her money in his wallet. It is painful enough to become single and broken hearted, believe me.

Of course when you are dating someone, it is necessary to spend a few bucks for some good times around. Catch great movies, fine dining, flowers, anniversaries, Valentine’s Day, telephone bills and much more of this and that, your spending per month could possibly cover for three months expenses if you are single. I’d rather referred it as an investment to keep a relationship on the go. Big or small your spending is, depends on how serious your commitment towards the relationship.

But that’s not the case here. What we talked about was not merely of a normal relationship basis; it was about how some people took advantages in the name of love because there will always be other people who were willing to pay for whatever the price was. I’ve seen some of my friends went through the same thing, how they suffered momentarily from the break-ups and recovered to find another.

Another friend interrupted, “Sometimes, it isn’t just about love. It’s hard to find one especially when you started to develop wrinkles on your face but your taste on young guys is still the same. We are out of options, out of time. That’s the problem. I feel more to a need of someone to keep me company, rather than sleeping alone at night and feeling bad about being single."

At least she made her point out. I guessed that money could buy almost anything these days. Just name the price. As long as you are willing to pay, you might even bargain love at special price. If love is something that we can easily get from the shelf of a convenience store, is it really love in the first place?

She simply replied, “I know that deep, deep inside his heart, he loved me. You guys might not see or feel it, but I did. And I feel good to think about it.”

Put aside principle, this is a question of heart. Every person deserves to live a happy life, no matter how they achieve it. Love has different definition for each person and we ought to have it, in our own way.

LET IT RAIN, LET IT RAIN

Couple of months before, the weather had been terribly hot and dry. It was sunny all day long, almost every day! I reckoned that it was the hottest summer ever for the past 10 years and heard from news that it was forecasted to last at least until end of August. The nights were warm and restless that even if I stripped down to wearing only a boxer, I could hardly still close my eyes to sleep. Even if I did eventually, I’d be waked up in the early morning of the hour, feeling grumpy and all sweaty. I knew that the next day at work would be hectic and stressful from the sleepless night I had.

“God, it’s damn hot. It’s impossible to go out in this hot weather.”

I blamed the terrible weather.

I wondered how the long and hot, sunny season had really changed me in a way that I was not even aware of. My mind went like, cluttered up with lot of nonsense stuffs that I couldn’t seem to get them out of my head. I’d gone back home feeling stressed out from frenzied day at work and too tired to even do my favorite stuffs I would normally do at home after work – watching Jimmy Oliver’s Naked Chef on Asian Food Channel or enjoying fine dishes with best friends at our favorite dinner place. I no longer spared my morning time jogging at the park during weekends and spent half hour afterwards digging in roti canai at nearby mamak stall. It seemed that everything was out of place and the only thing I did was just stayed at home, lied down under the ceiling fan at maximum speed, trying to put up with the heat.

Next thing I knew, I went to nearby electrical appliances shop and bought 3 air-conditioner units for each room in my home using my own savings.

Then, on one fine Friday morning after many days of the long, hot weather, it finally rained. I was just about to reach office when I remembered that I didn't bring along my umbrella. I've always kept at least one in my car but since there was no promising sign of raining for quite some time so I assumed that it was not a requisite urge to do so. I made it to office though, slightly wet and feeling chilly but relieved.

“Oh no, it’s raining. It’s impossible to go out in this bad weather.”

Again, I blamed the terrible weather.

I nearly disregarded the beauty of the rain I have always fallen in love with. I've always enjoyed the aesthetic appeal of rain. Moments before it began, the dreary sky looked pale and melancholic, as it metaphorically gave me these dreamy, romantic feelings inside. I didn’t know how exactly I should describe it but I would sit by window and watched the whole scenery took place, from the dramatic weather change until the very first raindrop started to dampen the ground. It was such a beautiful sight. It created the sense of calm and tranquility, to watch the pearly tiny raindrops dancing on my feet.

Somehow a thought popped up in my mind that there would always be good times around despite of all the bad circumstances we came across in our path. It might last for a minute only but it’s more meaningful if we took the time to accept the bitter part of life and to appreciate all the good things that come along with it. God made something happened for a reason.

Important thing is, I should learn to be grateful and to cherish the moment while it lasted.

Although the weather was still the same to this day, I had my umbrella with me this time.

Just in case it happened to rain.